461 Signs That You Are Obsessed With This Series
by A Single Drop of Blood
Summary: Exactly as the title says.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Chapter Notes:**

Alright, you are about to read the list I have put more effort into than any other in my entire life. And, sadly, I can say all 461 of these things apply to me. Maybe they apply to you, too!!!

And, NOTE! This list was written over the summer before Eclipse came out!!!

1. When you think up of new things for the characters to say/do in certain parts of the book.

2. When you get a mental image of what you think is going to happen in the next book after you read first chapter at the end of the last book. And you know that will never happen but you still like the idea.

3. You print out this list and highlight the ones you've done.

4. You talk about Twilight so much your friends' mothers are reading it now.

5. You skip you dinner break during band camp, wearing a Twilight shirt and glitter to get your Eclipse book.

6. When you go to get Eclipse the saleswoman recognizes you for begging for a midnight release party for Eclipse.

7. You screamed in Barnes and Noble when receiving your copy of Eclipse

8. During band rehearsal you start reading Eclipse and freshmen ask you if its summer reading and you say no. But it's on your personal summer reading list!

9. During band camp you talk about how sexy Edward Cullen is and one of freshmen ask you who he is. All your friends yell at the kid saying "OMG NOT AGAIN! LOOK WHAT YOU DID. YOU GOT HER STARTED. NOW SHE WON'T SHUT UP!"

10. You and your twilight fan friends fight in the middle of rehearsal over edward. Calling each other 'homewreckers' and start slapping each other's face

11. You argue on which days you can own Edward.

12. All the days got mixed up you just decided to clone Edward.

13. You're watching The Price is Right and when a guy named Edward wins the showcase, you cheer loud enough that all your neighbors hear it.

14. When your friend goes on a trip, you tell her to 'find an Edward Cullen for me.'

15. You videotape yourself sleeping to see if you talk about Edward

16. You saw the Bella handbag at Forever 21 and had to buy it.

17. The playlists that Stephenie Meyer makes for her books are the only songs you listen to.

18. Your music style has suddenly changed from girly pop to only the bands that are listed on Stephenie Meyer's Myspace.

19. After reading Eclipse, you petitioned for your school (or house) to get air conditioning, just in case you didn't seem enough anti-Jacob

20. You check twice a day for updates.

21. You went to a plastic surgeon to see if you could get a heart-shaped face and bigger lips.

22. You made shirts for you and your boyfriend: yours says Bella and his says Edward

23. The second that Twilight and New Moon went on your school approved reading list, you got excited because you had a reason for your mom to lift the grounding on all books by Stephenie Meyer

24. You will now only read books with black and red on the cover

25. You asked your school counselor if they could make a class dedicated to the Twilight books.

26. When one of your friends said that she liked Jacob, you refused to talk to her for a month.

27. You spent all summer indoors (so you wouldn't tan) and denying yourself sleep (to get those perfect dark circles). When people see you the first day of school, you say that you are going for the 'vampire look.'

28. You look up and the suction tip you are supposed to be holding in the person's mouth is no longer in there because you were daydreaming about Edward!

29. You carry all three books with you everywhere in a shoulder bag even if you have crutches because you have a broken ankle,(yes I did this, and still do)

30. You hear Edward and Bella in your head all the time and you actually take advice from them (me)

31. You have dreams where Edward and Bella appear in your room and they have to stay at your house, and Edward keeps laughing at your spastic thoughts :(

32. Your mom gets mad at you when you can't stop babbling to all her friends about the books.

33. You actually read all three books out loud (including Eclipse) to your best guy friend,

34. You then scold said guy friend for not being like Edward.

35. You have a compulsive night routine where you listen to Claire de Lune and read a chapter of Wuthering Heights every night before bed.

36. You've read all three books more then you can count.

37. You name your charcters in a video game after the characters in Twilight.

38. You answer clothing surveys, you answer everything twilight or Edward Cullen related, just so they will hopefully put Twilight clothing items in the store.

39. You try to convince everyone you know to read the books.

40. You believe your friend when she says her cats are vampires. You cat sit for her and then suddenly yell out "YES, BITE ME!" to her black cat with yellowish eyes (true story).

41. You have an alter ego named after a Twilight character.

42. You squeal whenever Edward's name comes up in the book, and by now, people are used to it.

43. On Halloween, you wear designer-looking clothes, whiten your teeth, leave dark circles under your eyes, make sure your super pale, and go trick or treating. When people ask who or what you are, you roll your eyes and say you're a vampire...obviously!

44. You get paranoid whenever you're around your friend, James, thinking he might all of a sudden throw you across the room, breaking every bone in your body.

45. You practice your snarling.

46. You talk to your friend about how much you love Edward, and when they say why they can't have Edward, you growl and then say they can have someone else. (I did this with my friend. She asked that, if I got Edward, who could she get. XD, I immediately said Jasper.)

47. You compare one of your drawings of the book cover to the actual cover itself and start to cry when you didn't get the angle on the arms right, or the apple wasn't big enough, or the stem of the flower was too skinny, etc.

48. You go to bed and before you fall asleep, you gasp silently to yourself and run to the window to see if Edward's there.

49. You jump for joy when you look through your old band music and see the song "Claire de Lune". (I did play this song in Grade 6, it wasn't nearly as good as hearing it done professionally.)

50. The ONLY cars you will even consider having are a silver Volvo, an old red truck, or a Turbo 911 (a yellow one.. duh)

51. You've started to dress like the characters.

52. You attempt on making some random super big dude with dark skin angry, in hopes that he'll explode and grow fur.

53. You buy dozens of CD's and arrange them in your room exactly as Edward has.

54. You match every song you hear to Twilight, including disco songs such as Funky White Boy.

55. You have your Eclipse poster from New Moon, hanging by your bed so every night you can read the quote before you fall asleep.

56. Your e-mail name is volvos4vamps.

57. Your little sister slapped you because you've been talking about Twilight to much

58. When you offer the book to your friends' little siblings (and almost cry when they say no...).

59. When you go to sit on Santa's lap, you ask for an "Edward Cullen."

60. You mark your favourite bits of Twilight with post-its as you read so you can automatically flip to whatever quotes/scenes you want to read each day.

61. Or alternatively, you've already memorized the pages.

62. You log on to at the 59th minute of every hour, just so you can get the satisfaction of seeing there is one less hour to go until the release of eclipse.

63. You've asked your mum or dad to get a job at Barnes and Noble so you might be able to get your copy of Breaking Dawn extra early, too.

64. As soon as you finished Twilight, you ran out and bought every Linkin Park album in the store, although you never liked them before. You then sit and listen for the next 3 hours, trying to figure out which songs Bella would've liked.

65. You start taking ballet lessons to try and walk more like Alice.

66. You've started walking lopsided because you're always walking around with 2 hardback copies of Twilight and New Moon and Eclipse in your already heavy, one shouldered schoolbag.

67. If you can't find some sort of relation to Twilight/New Moon in the lyrics of a song, however faint, you immediately hate it.

68. you swear you're not going to marry anyone unless their surname is Cullen.

69. You surprise your mother, who has been nagging at you to read literary classics for years to improve your english, by eagerly reading Wurthering Heights, Pride and Prejudice, Sense and Sensibility, and Romeo and Juliet after seeing them mentioned in Twilight.

70. You fail your English Lit exam, because in your essay you accidentally kept referring to Romeo and Juliet as Edward and Bella.

71. You try going a week without sleeping, to see what it would be like to be a Cullen.

72. You've faked an illness so you can go to hospital and see if there are any Carlisle look-a-like doctors.

73. You nearly hurt the saleswoman the first time you purchased Eclipse by viciously ripping it out of her hands.

74. You nearly got arrested for shoplifting because you were so delighted with your copy of New Moon that you grabbed it off the shelf and almost ran out of the store to run home as fast as you can and read it, forgetting to pay.

75. There is a sacred place set in your room for your Twilight books.

76. You buy all your friends copies of Twilight/New Moon for their birthdays.

77. When your friend emails you from abroad to ask how your holidays are, you launch into a 50 minute rant about how much better vacation would be if Edward were here.

78. Just like Bella, you constantly forget to breathe when Edward gives one of his perfect crooked smiles (because you can imagine it perfectly in your head).

79. You've heard a new guy called Edward is coming to your school, and you've already devised a foolproof plan to make him your boyfriend.

80. There's a boy called Edward, Jasper or Carlisle in your class, and he's asked you multiple times to please stop stalking him around.

81. You're now as pale as the Cullens, because you've spent all summer doing nothing but rereading Twilight and New Moon on the couch.

82. Your favorite bands are the Bella Cullen Project and the Mitch Hansen Band (bands that have all their songs inspired by Twilight)

83. Your English teacher asks why you keep spelling your name Stephanie with an 'e', like Stephenie Meyer.

84. Your friends stop calling you to ask you to hang out, because your reply is always 'Can't. Too busy. Rereading Twilight.'

85. You could get a scholarship to Oxford or Yale if the Eng.Lit text was on Twilight.

86. You keep a little journal of all your favourite Twilight quotes/perfect songs to fit the fandom.

87. You would never date anyone named Jacob because you are so anti-Jacob.

88. Calculus suddenly doesn't seem that terrible anymore...

89. You no longer use make up to cover your under eye cirlces; rather you embrace them, knowing you share at least one similarity with the beauties that are Alice and Rosalie Cullen.

90. Stephenie Meyer can recognize you in a crowd because you 'stalk' her so much.

91. Your English teacher has asked you to please stop naming every single of the characters in your creative essays 'Edward' or 'Bella'.

92. When someone mentions the words Twilight, Edward, Bella, Cullen or Vampire, your friends instinctively all plug in their headphones so they don't have to listen to the impending 40 minute speech about how much you love Twilight coming up.

93. You don't play the piano, but you've listened to Clair de Lune so many times you figured out how to play it through listening.

94. Right now, your mind is whirling with ideas for your next Twilight fanfic.

95. You don't want to go to sleep because you're scared Edward won't be there when you wake up.

96. Your little sister knows the names of the characters.

97. Whenever she sees the name of a Twilight character, she says, "Hey look it's Edward!" (or whoever it is)

98. You have an Edward that follows you around everywhere, talking to you, touching you --- and only you can see and hear him

99. You are a member of 53 fansites for the series.

100. You're always talking about Twilight.

101. You don't talk to your mom for a week because she won't read Twilight

102. You squeal at every silver Volvo you see

103. Every time it rains you think of Twilight

104. When you re-read New Moon you skip from when Edward left until he comes back

105. Your mom is sick of you calling her Bella.

106. Your dad is sick of you calling him Edward.

107. You have uncontrollable fits of laughter every time someone says something funny in Twilight.

108. You refuse to read New Moon (again) because it causes physical pain when Edward leaves Bella. But you know that in ten minutes, youll be reading it again, just skipping the 'cry' parts..

109. After reading Twilight you start to wonder if your cat is a Vampire and you try to get it to bite you so you can be a vampire and go find Edward.

110. Your nieghbors come home from vaction wondering why after you took care of their dog it now answers to Bella instead of its real name.

111. You get mad at your friend because she's had your twilight book for almost a week

112. You're thinking about buying a new copy for yourself and telling her to give you 20 bucks

113. You have hour long phone conversations focused entirely on Edward

114. You know you'll be pacing around the house on August 7th waiting for them to deliver Eclipse

115. You start talking about twilight out loud to yourself

116. You've already got your neighbor and your neighbors daughter anxiously awaiting the arrival of your Eclipse book

117. You have found enough time to read all the personal correspondence Q&A's

118. You convince your parents to name your new baby sister Isabella.

119. You see the car name of "Eclipse" and you gasp a little and become giddy.

120. You actually get showered and ready for bed in a rush because you think that Edward will be waiting for you.

121. You get dissapointed when he's not there to watch you sleep.

122. You pretend he's there any way.

123. Sometimes while reading Twilight you look up from the book shocked to find you're not in Forks and you don't actually remember were you are.

124. Every night a few minutes before midnight you get on and watch the countdown to Eclipse get one day closer.

125. You know your obsessed with Twilight when you keep on playing hangman endlessly until you find Edward's name.

126. When you randomly walk into a church and pray to Stephenie Meyer with your copy of Twilight that you bring everywhere.

127. When you dream about having one wish and that one wish is that Twilight was reality and you were Edward's "mate"

128. When you read New Moon out to your mother and then made her read it from the very beginning (Twilight)

129. You almost kill said mother when she calls Edward "feminine"

130. When you almost kill, (again) said mother for trying to psycologically analysing Edward (HE CAN'T BE PUT INTO ANY CATAGORY)

131. When you realize that every thing you've ever written and dreamt of will never compare to Twilight at all

132. When you want to take calculus because it's on Edward's timetable even though you argued with your teacher that you hated it.

133. When you get embarrassed about thoughts you have because you never know who could be 'listening'

134. You practise closing your mind so if you came across an Edward he wouldn't judge you

135. When you break up with your boyfriend because "it's not sexy to sleep, you have to watch me" (this was told to me by a friend)

136. Whenever you play Hangman your word is Twilight related.

137. You at first loathe Rosalie, but when she apologizes to Bella, you start to like her

138. You drive to school on an icy day, thinking to yourself the whole way there if Edward will save you from an out of control van

139. When you almost get hit my a van, you freak out when Edward wasn't the one who saved you

140. You want to go cliff diving

141. You constantly imagine how awesome (XD) Edward smells

142. You've spent countless hours drawing anything Twilight/New Moon related

143. When people ask you what you want to be when you grow up, you immidiately say you want to be a doctor... who's also a vampire

144. You get dizzy when you smell blood

145. You get nervous if you go into a ballet studio

146. You spend however much time needed picturing what the Twilight character's look like

147. You hate Dracula movies

148. When you're sitting at home reading "the book" on halloween (you finished trick or treating) and a group of kids come to your door, they're all wearing those awful vampire costumes, and you reluctantly give them each one half of a small chocolate bar. When they pout, you tell them "if you sparkle in the sun, I might consider giving you seconds."

149. You want to/or about to go to Brigham Young University

150. You're determined to learn how to play piano, even though you have no musical talent whatsoever.

151. You redecorate your room to look like Bella/Edward's (personally, I prefer Edward's)

152. You don't eat your lunch and when your friends ask, you say "I just had my share of an irritable grizzly"

153. You try to run as fast as you can (faster, even) in hopes that you could be as fast as a vampire

154. You're desperate to have freezing skin

155. You want to have the graceful dancer's walk like Alice has...

156. ...psh, you just want to be graceful!

157. You constantly remind people that vampires don't burn up in the sun, don't sleep in coffins, etc.

158. You run away from anyone with crazy red hair.

159. You write Me+Edward♥on your myspace page and everyone asks who's Edward?????!!!!!!!

160. You threaten to kill your friend if she gets New Moon before you...

161. You've read all the outtakes and Midnight Sun twice at the very least.

162. The Eclipse quote of the day is your MSN pm.

163. You get mad at your friend when you tell her your theory that Bella's hallucinations aren't just that, they're because Edward truly is looking after her and your friend laughs and tells you otherwise. (yeah my friend did that)

164. Harry Potter 7 used to be the #1 book you had to get this summer... now it's Eclipse! Harry who?

165. You and your friend have complete discussions about what will happen next in the book/series

166. You also have discussions about who would be perfect to play Edward in Twilight the movie.

167. You will cry if it doesn't become a movie.

168. And then you decide that the only reasonable person to play Edward is Edward himself.

169. You have Twilight induced dreams...

170. You talk about those dreams...

171. In gym class you wish you were a vampire so you could run faster.

172. And then you remember you have something in common with Bella if you suck at gym.

173. You start laughing uncontrollably when Tyler comes to Bella's house to take her to the prom.

174. You want to go to Italy even more now!

175. You want to be a vampire for Halloween but don't think it would be possible to get a costume...

176. You want to almost die so one of the cullens will turn you into a vampire.

177. You actually like the song Clair de lune by Debussy.

178. After reading the book you could make connections to the book and real life all the time.

179. Your "I can write really well" ego gets bruised when you even look at the books.

180. After getting your mom obsessed with Twilight, you decide to get your friend's mom obsessed, too.

181. And you constantly have intense conversations about the pain experienced when Edward left. (wince)

182. Whenever you and your friends talk about Edward, your voices get higher and higher until your words are nothing but a squeal, and everyone around you stares at you like you're total freaks.

183. Your name on MSN Messenger is 'I (heart) Edward'.

184. You read Twilight and New Moon over and over just so you can be with Edward.

185. When you see a vampire costume at the store you ask the store manager if you can burn it because that's now how real vampires look.

186. You find yourself wondering what Edward's snarl sounds like.

187. You hyperventilate when you're reading about James and Bella in the ballet studio, even though you've already read that part about a million times and already know exactly what's going to happen.

188. When your friends ask you what you've been doing all day, the only honest answer you can come up with is "Thinking about Edward."

189. Your mom's reading Twilight again and you bug her to hurry up so you can read it for the twelfth time.

190. You're afraid that if you don't read Twilight over and over again you'll forget what Edward looks like.

191. When Edward leaves in New Moon, you develop the same hole in your chest that Bella does and often find yourself gasping for air.

192. Your new dream car is a silver 2005 Volvo S60R, even though you really don't know what that is.

193. You start calling everyone by the characters' names.

194. You name your pants after Edward.

195. You shout Edward's name everytime San Jose is mentioned.

196. You want to kill your friend Emily just because her name was mentioned in New Moon and yours wasn't.

197. You are planning on getting a passport for you birthday in case you have to go save Edward (I have actually explained this concept to my parents. Apparently I explained it well too! I am getting one in November! lol)

198. You have asked you Grandmother/family member if you can name her next dog Emmett because it just sounds right (mine said yes :)

199. You also look for houses that could be Charlie's house or the Cullen family's house.

200. You were super excited when you found out that there might be a Twilight movie. You might have even squealed.

201. When you realize you either don't look like Bella or are too young to play the role of Bella, you became super sad.

202. You imagine yourself playing the role of Bella anyway, even if you don't look like her or if you are too young.

203. You spend a lot of your time on You spend even more time reading and/or writing Twilight fanfics.

205. You're about to die waiting for Eclipse to come out.

206. You try to force your friends to read Twilight, and if they refuse or seem uninterested, you become upset.

207. You're always looking up actors and actresses who could play the characters.

208. You lose focus in class because you're daydreaming about Edward.

209. You subconsciously write, "I heart Edward Cullen" all over youre notebook.

210. When you go swimming, you stay under water too long because you forget you have to breathe because you're not a vampire.

211. You take your books with you everywhere you go.

212. You almost cry when you forget your books when you go on a long trip.

213. You're thinking, "Ha! I would never forget my books."

214. You pretty much loathe all other books about vampires.

215. You made a playlist to go with Twilight and/or New Moon.

216. You're convinced Edward and the Cullens are real.

217. You're convinced to go to Forks, Washington and prove it.

218. If anyone with really pale skin who is good looking walks by, you follow them to see if they sparkle in the sun.

219. You might've yelled at your New Moon book when Edward left.

220. Sometimes you hate Bella because Edward is her boyfriend and not your's.

221. You often don't realize how sad that is.

222. You brush your teeth way more than usual because you want your teeth to be as shiny as the Cullens'.

223. You're hinking about Edward right now.

224. You have made your friends read them and they in turn fall in love with them also, then you all name each other after characters and then you hear of people who actually have the rare names (such as Esme) and then hate them without even knowing them.

225. Your new favorite colors are black and red.

226. You threw away all of your fake vampire teeth from Halloween... Edward would not approve of wearing those foul things!

227. You get New Moon and read it during first and second period instead of taking your finals.

228. You read New Moon in two hours flat, taking painful breaks from the gripping story to write the quadratic equation and solve for X.

229. You look up from your book and realize that it might be the best book you've ever read.

230. You take into consideration that you read three books a day. Literally.

231. You spend three hours a day thinking about what powers Bella is going to have.

232. You jump for joy upon hearing that Stephenie is a mormon, because you are too.

233. You stop speaking to your friend because she doesn't like Twilight. (Note: this happened to me. I will never understand her, and all of our socialization is about as friendly as Lauren to Bella.)

234. You pity your friend Lauren for her name.

235. You plan on naming your daughters Alice and Isabella.

236. You are motivated to write a book of your own, but only end up writing fanfic, because no love story can compare.

237. You've made your homepage on your computer You freak out at your mom when you tell her you can't wait till august for Eclipse to come out, and how much you love Edward, and she blankly stares at you and asks two things: whether or not you have a boyfriend she doesn't know about named Edward (yeah, in my dreams) and what's Eclipse?

239. Your best friend's family friend knows you're literally in love with a fictional character named Edward Cullen.

240. When June 20th comes around you give everyone Cullen cookies and birthday cakes. AND send many bulletins on MySpace wishing him a happy birthday.

241. You see a Newton Bar and immediately freak out and think of Mike Newton.

242. You look for people in the mall that look like characters from Twilight... and then you ask if you can take a picture with them.

243. You see random people and then say to youself, hmmmmm that person looks like from Twilight.

244. You dream about Edward and yourself in a meadow.

245. You sleep with Twilight under your pillow/next to you.

246. You want to kill Bella so you can have Edward.

247. You wish on a shooting star for your b-day that you can become a vampire or make Edward come alive so you can marry him.

248. You read so much fanfiction that you have to read the book between fanfics because you get confused what is in the book and what isn't.

249. You get butterflies in your stomach when you don't have your book with you.

250. Anything anyone says you relate to the book!

251. Your eating lunch with your friends at a nice restaurant, and tell them, "Well, it's no irritable grizzly..."

252. You name all of your fish after characters in Twilight the day after you read it, naming your favorite ones Edward and Bella, and your least favorite James and Victoria.

253. You don't start reading the book until 10:30 p.m. and stay up until 5:00 a.m. on a school day, not realizing how late you were up, because you couldn't even look at the clock you were so into the book.

254. Your friends have to tell you to stop talking about Edward.

255. Your friends have to constantly remind you that Edward is NOT your real boyfriend.

256. Your friends also have to constantly remind you that your name is NOT Bella.

257. You start thinking of ways you could somehow meet a guy exactly like Edward.

258. You decide Edward is a real person hiding from the world, and then you are convinced to go on a world wide trip to find him.

259. Your actually in love with Edward.

260. You giggle when Edward says something funny in the book.

261. You get butterflies in your stomach and say 'awwwww' when Edward says something sweet to Bella.

262. You talk to your book while your reading it, and everyone thinks your crazy.

263. After you read Twilight, a copy from the library, you go back to get New Moon, and someone else has it checked out, and you consider asking the librarian who, so that you can go to their house and strangle them, then steal the book.

264. You actually do ask the librarian who has the book. But they wouldn't tell you...

265. You want to fall in love with a vampire.

266. You decide vampires are real.

267. You want to be a vampire so you can fall in love with a vampire.

268. You want to somehow be magically transformed into the world of Twilight. As the role of Bella, of course.

269. You start crying everytime you read the story because you wish your life could be like Bella's

270. You spend all night searching through galleries and making Twilight related wallpapers.

271. You convince yourself that you must stop re-reading Twilight in school because Edward makes you feel that your boyfriend is inferior. Somewhat.

272. When you're bored you tend to visit and read the FAQ or Extras over and over.

273. You're insanely jealous when you find out that August 7th is your friend's birthday.

274. You and your friend plot to go to Forks to kidnap Edward.

275. You have your copy of Twilight open in front of you as you're typing this.

276. No matter how many times you've read it, you laugh for a long time at Tyler's stupidity and total obliviousness.

277. Some characters constantly remind you of people in your life.

278. At certain points in the book, you just have to stop and sigh, wishing just one more time you could be Bella.

279. When you've finished reading, you get random urges to hug people. Preferrably Edward. But as that sadly isn't possible, you walk over to your boyfriend and give him a big hug, and he's curious as to why. Because he's read the book, but is nearly as oblivious as Tyler.

280. You growled at someone for trying to take your Twilight/New Moon book.

281. You listen to the song "Vampires Will Never Hurt You" by My Chemical Romance and you automatically think of Edward protecting Bella.

282. You squee at the thought of anything Twilight related.

283. You just squee'd.

284. You constantly search Twilight, New Moon, etc. on Google.

285. You've submitted more than 3 of the obsessed things.

286. You freaked out when your friend had your copy of Twilight for 3 days because then you couldn't read it for the millionth time.

287. Your friend who you haven't seen in 3 years and who lives half way across the country knows your in love with Edward Cullen.

288. Your friends know how to make you mad by saying Edward is gay :(

289. You write on your guy friends hand you love Edward Cullen.

290. People know every detail about Edward even though they have no clue who he is.

291. You actually got yelled at by 6 of your friends at the same time for talking about Edward.

292. You have talked about Edward so much that you actually lost your voice.

293. You make your mom read Twilight.

294. Your mom becomes almost as obsessed with Edward as you are.

295. You call your cat Emmet because he attacks things.

296. You went to all three book stores closest to you on May 5th, just to find the special version of New Moon with the first chapter of Eclipse, and yelled profanities while leaving each of those bookstores without the book (since it was sold out. GR!)

297. You can't help whisper "do you want me to bolt the door so you can massacre the unsuspecting townsfolk" as you walk through the door of your prom location.

298. You forget that you're in your school lunch and don't remember until the person you're sitting with closes the book [Twilight to get your attention. You then respond by glaring and convincing yourself it's better to NOT bite their hand off.

299. You and your friends speak of what type of vampire you want to be.

300. Your friend carries a vial of her blood around her neck and you want to do the same.

301. You read New Moon the whole time you are in the keys for spring break.

302. Your mom thinks you are on the phone under the covers on a school night but you are actually using the light on your cell phone to read Twilight.

303. When someone talks about a friend or family member with one of the characters names, you give them the third degree about whether they're REALLY as old as they say they are.

304. You smile or blush when you look at a map and see Carlise, PA or Rosalie, NE or even Cullen, VA (my personal favorite).

305. You chased down the entirety of BOTH playlists and decided to make one of your own afterward.

306. You taught yourself to ride a motorcycle by thinking of the clutch as a live grenade. After you do a header into the mud, you wonder why your Edward hallucination didn't tell you how stupid and reckless you were being.

307. You toss in Twilight/ New Moon quotes at every opportunity.

308. Your parents ignore you when you rant about Twilight. They're used to it by now.

309. You refer to writing a fanfic as "making your own drugs."

310. You submit "You Might Be Obsessed" suggestions- and every one of them is true for you!

311. When you are reading this the book is sitting in your lap with your arms wrapped around it.

312. You have to write your obituary in journalism class and in the obituary, you say that you married Edward Cullen and your kids names are Alice, Rosalie, and Emmett.

313. When you see a reference to Bella and Edward in a fanfic you immediatly giggle with glee.

314. And post a comment about that said reference.

315. You convince your boyfriend to read the books and get him addicted.

316. He gets so addicted that he thinks New Moon sucks cause Edward left.

317. You're the editor of the yearbook but you neglect your duties the day before a huge deadline to look for new posts on the forums and submit things to the site.

318. You accidentally get a friend in trouble for obsessing about Edward across the room.

319. You draw comics of Emmett totally beasting a bear.

320. You show your friend who's into Linkin Park the acknowledgments in the back of New Moon.

321. You get very excited when you read the acknowledgments in the back of New Moon and see several of your favorite bands.

322. You obsessively read the first chapter of Midnight Sun during your Media Assistant elective under the pretense of "doing work".

323. The only time you leave the house without a copy of one of the books is when you go out for dinner.

324. You spend several hours on the couch, silent, reading New Moon when you first get it and surprise your sister's boyfriend who had heard that you were very talkative.

325. You stay up till 2 on a school night because you just have to finish re-reading New Moon and/or Twilight.

326. As much as you want to, you can't bring yourself to skip any part of New Moon, even to get to Edward and you get very anxious, although you know exactly what's gonna happen next.

327. You've memorized a very long quote of Bella's and constantly scare your friends by reciting it at top speed.

328. If anyone tries to touch a copy of your books, you slap and fight with them until they leave.

329. is one of the sites you check several times a day just to see if there's any new news.

330. You read the Q&A on the Eclipse Prom over and over again although there's no chance you'll be able to go.

331. You analyze the lyrics to your favorite song and try to relate them to New Moon. And manage to get it to make sense.

332. You and your friends plan to go to Barnes&Noble on May 5th just to read the first chapter of Eclipse in the special edition.

333. In the likely case that it's in plastic, you're planning on buying the special edition just to have your very own copy of the mini poster, the tattos (which you plan on plastering all over your forehead), and to be able to see the first chapter of Eclipse in print.

334. You want to plan an Eclipse party.

335. You plan on going over to a friend's house to make shirts that say 'Real Men Sparkle'.

336. When you hear a quote from Twilight/New Moon, you can tell the exact page and scene it is located in.

337. Your teachers constantly have to take your copy of New Moon away in class because although you've read it 10 times already, you just have to read it again.

338. You spend a whole night reading the Extras and Outtakes from the books and looking for Twilight fan sites and neglect to do your homework.

339. You read the Extras and Outtakes while listing to Linkin Park.

340. When your friend is reading it, every time you see them you ask what part they're at and go on to discuss what just happened and why.

341. You write book reviews for a class on both books and discuss in length why you love Edward.

342. You convince your school librarians to read and get them hooked.

343. You end up discussing the books with the school librarians.

344. You convince the librarians to get Twilight and are excessively happy when you see several copies of that and New Moon on the shelves.

345. You give up your month's allowance so that your mom will bring you to the bookstore and buy New Moon just days after you finished Twilight.

346. Your real boyfreind doesn't even get weirded out anymore when you call him Edward (hey, it's not the real thing, but we can dream right?)

347. You write "GO EDWARD" on everything within a 10 mile radius.

348. People only know you as the "Edward girl".

349. You bought a copy of Twilight just to look at it after you finished reading your friend's.

350. Almost all your friends have now read Twilight.

351. You plan to marry your book.

352. Your teachers are now reading Twilight.

353. You once wanted to be tan, now you want to be really, really pale.

354. When your friends ask to meet your boyfriend, you shove Twilight in their faces and yell, "He's right here!"

355. Your copy of Twilight is so battered that most of the pages have fallen out, and instead of throwing it away, you give it a proper burial. You cry at the burial. Constantly.

356. You talk to Bella more than you talk to your mother.

357. Edward, Bella and the rest of the Cullens have taken over your dreams.

358. You actually think about changing your name to Bella when you turn 18.

359. You actually change your name to Bella when you are 18.

360. You name your kids after Twilight characters.

361. When you finished Twilight, you cried.

362. When you heard there was a sequel, you paraded around the house for twenty minutes.

363. You find yourself wishing you were a vampire.

364. When you have sudden happiness or sadness, you search for Jasper.

365. Deja vu reminds you of Alice.

366. You can answer yes to any of these questions.

367. Pro-wrestlers remind you of Emmett.

368. You asked that blonde doctor at the hospital if his name was Carlisle Cullen.

369. You want a summer home in Forks.

370. If anyone says, "the book" you automatically think of twilight.

371. You wake up at night wondering if Edward is watching you sleep.

372. When you read or see Snow White, you think of Esme.

373. Your favorite website is a Twilight fan site.

374. You think about getting an Audi, because Edward would approve...

375. Whenever you see one of the cars mentioned in twilight, you look inside to see if Emmett or Jasper or anyone else might be hiding in there.

376. You notice that you look a little bit like Bella, and wonder if someone might mistake you for her...

377. Whenever you hear people in the backgrounds of commercials with sooth, pleasant voices, you shudder and think of James.

378. Your friend jokes about stealing your book and you yell at him.

379. You name your pet after a twilight character

380. You write I Love Edward on your cell phone banner

381. You constantly talk about Twilight

382. You're constantly on reading the Twilight stories.

383. You go through withdrawl when your friend has your copy of Twiligt hostage

384. You love a character from the book coughEdwardcoughcough

385. You try to force yourself to have Twilight related dreams

386. You buy Debussey:Greatest Hits and Linkin Park cds because Edward and Bella like them.

387. You have all kinds of Twilight avatars

388. When someone asks who's Edward and Bella(refering to your avatar), you jump into an hour long description of the book

389. You talk about it constantly so your friends will read it and then you have someone who knows all those inside jokes

390. You write fanfics

391. You adopt topaz as your new favorite gem

392. You always find small things that make you think about Twilight and then you go into a major daydream about Edward :)

393. When you begin to believe that vampires actually exist

394. When you enjoy the fact that you think vampires exist

395. When you think of the best characters to play the cullen family and bella if your school had a twilight play and cant stop looking at them and get jeolous for no reason at the bella look alike

396. When you meet the perfect boy and wander if he could be a vampire...

397. You hope that Stephenie Meyer is a fortune teller and is telling the story of your life and replacing your name with Bella Swan

398. You scribble down "Edward Cullen" so much that you have to hide your evidence so that your parents dont question because his name is too precious to be destroyed

399. When you are in the middle of a reasonable book and have to stop so you can re-read Twilight for what seems like the one millionth time

400. When you are reading it for the one millionth time still get affected by it the same as you were the first time

401. When you fight with yourself to not read any spoilers of new moon but give into the closest but safe temptation.

402. When you get sad every night because Edward isn't laying on your bed and waiting for you

403. When your in the middle of your English exam, and it says the name "Edward" on your example and you get butterflies in your stomach and waste 5 minutes fantisizing "what if he walked into this very english room"...then later on in the English exam...it says something about being pale in a book quote and Immediately picture Edward again. ::waits another 5 minutes::

404. You threaten your friend to read faster; he's had the book going on 2 days and is on pg 45...I read it in one sitting.

405. You have written something about Edward on everyone of your Geometry worksheets.

406. You're grades dramatically dropped after reading Twilight, due to thinking about it (Edward) in class.

407. Teachers, friends, random people know you as" the girl w/ that book" because you carry it around in school, work, home..etc.

408. You have a vampire/Twilight related nickname.

409. You've tried to convince your parents to let you go to Forks.

410. If you didnt have to even convince them...they just said, "okay, with who?"

411. You swear that this one guy in school looks just like Edward, only if his hair wasnt black. [I pic Edward w/ black hair anyway

412. Teachers give you odd looks when they see you reading it...again...and again...x10

413. You dont know where your remote/money/coat/hw...etc is; but you know where your book is at ALL times.

414. You suddenly listen to Classical music and/or want a volvo. [doesnt apply to me; I listened to classical before hehe Imma oddball

415. You're reading these nodding going "Uh huh, yep, did that" lol

416. You've read the book 20+ times

417. You put the Clair de Lune on your Myspace profile.

418. You now have an obsession with the books Pride and Prejudice and Sense and Sensibility.

419. You sometimes daydream that Edward is really in Forks, and just hiding from everyone.

420. You sometimes think your daydream is true.

421. Because you think this daydream is true, you now want to move to Washington.

422. You sometimes dream that you are Bella.

423. You now love mushroom ravioli.

424. You say, "I wish guys could be more like Edward, " at school and everyone gives you the strangest look because they have no clue what you're talking about.

425. You compare guys to Edward in real life.

426. When you can't watch a movie in science without hearing "it was so hard to fight the urge to just once stroke his perfect face" in your head

427. When you watch said movie in science with your arms crossed tightly across your chest

428. When you find your self jelous of Bella for having a life that seems perfect while at the same time loving her

429. When you find that every song you listen to has a hiddden meaning relating to twilight

430. When you find yourselves insted of daydreaming - imagening twilight scenes and quotes

431. When EVERY one of your binders/notebooks have I ¢¾ Edward on them.

432. When you're going away on a trip (you of course plan to bring Twilight) someone asks you who your going with and you reply with "Oh, Bella and Edward are going to keep me company"

433. When you can sit and read all 498 pages of the book in one sitting

434. When your boyfriend starts getting totally jealous of your constant chatter about Edward

435. When your boyfriend has to tell you to STOP reading him your favorite quotes over the phone

436. When you have quotes written EVERYWHERE

437. When you dream about being Bella, just so you can have Edward

438. When some random stranger in Wal-Mart asks your name you tell them "Bella" or "Alice"

439. When your favorite girl and boy names suddenlt become Edward and Isabella

440. When your mother yells at you to stop writing I love EC all over your binder

441. When your mother grounds you from reading twilight

442. You cried when she went so far as to TAKE IT AWAY during your grounding!

443. When you and your friend (who is also obsessed with twilight) play a game on the phone where you guess the part of twilight that they are reading from...and you always win.

444. When the first thing that you do when you get a cell phone is take a picture of twilight and putit as you background.

445. When your cousins know who Edward Cullen is but have never read the book, and know him as the character that you are madly in love with.

446. When you ask your cousin to read it (welll actually force) and then refuse to give them your copy because its sacred.

447. When everything and anything reminds you of Twilight, reminding you of Edward, and causing you to squeal, generator a bunch of stares from absolute strangers.

448. When you here a song that absolutely reminds you of New Moon you start to screamand force yourself to learn all the words, and your sister stars at you like a maniac.

449. When you talk to the computer when you are on the Lexicon due to a sudden urge of agreement and your sister thinks you are talking to yourself.

450. When you are scared out of your wits of something, you convice yourself that if anything happens, you will definetly (sp) be rescued by Edward, even though he lives on the other side of the country.

451. When your dad knows your obbsession over vampires.

452. And mom.

453. When everything on your MySpace is somehow related to Twilight.

454. When you tell your parents that you want a Volvo, even though you really don't like the look of it that much.

455. When you bought Wuthering Heights, just because Bella read it.

456. When you want to go to Forks and are thinking of what reason to tell your parents that you want to go to Forks for, every day.

457. When you suddenly love the name Alice and Edward, even though you absolutely hated them before.

458. When everytime you see the name (Isa) Bella, Edward, Alice, Rosalie, Emmett, Jasper, Esme, Carlisle, or any other character name in credit, you get butterflies in your stomach and look around the theater wildly for them.

459. When you're sitting in theatre and your teacher is talking about theatre history, and gladiator battles. and they mention people getting thrown into the ampitheatre with a couple of bears, and you immeditaly gget this mental image of emmatt in the coliseum beating the crap out of a couple of bears in fron of an astonidshed crowd, and you start laughing, and everyone looks at you like your nuts.

450. You start going up to random people to tell them you want an Edward!

451. You think your next door neighbor looks like a vampire, or he really is a vampire.

452. You try to control your thoughts because Edward might hear them.

453. You've read Twilight and New Moon at least 5 times each!

454. You think your best friend's crazy for not reading Twilight or New Moon.

455. You give your teachers Twilight and/or New Moon for Christmas.

456. When you see a box labeled "Forks" at a restruant you think there's something imported from Forks, Washington in there.

457. Twilight has ruined any and all future reading for you.

458. You use Twilight for every single school project that pops up.

459. You just read this entire list to see if you really were obsessed with Twilight.

460. You're sad that this list ended so soon.

461. You made a list of all the things you do.

**Chapter End Notes:**

YAY! Haha, memories of my Twilight insanity... Tell me what you all think!!!!!

:D


	2. Just in Case

Hey all,

Some people have been asking, and, since I apparently didn't make it clear enough before, Yes. ALL of these apply to me. Every single obsessing one.

:D


End file.
